Preparing for Love: How Singles Can Build Relationship Readiness
Will Goodwin, M.A
Many believe relationship skills only develop within relationships, but the truth is, single life offers a powerful opportunity to prepare for long-term commitment. Healthy, lasting partnerships require emotional awareness, communication tools, and resilience—skills that can be nurtured in a wide variety of relational contexts prior to love’s arrival.
1. Build Self-Awareness
Understanding your emotional patterns is key. Reflect on past relationships (romantic or otherwise) to notice recurring challenges. Are you conflict-avoidant? Do you struggle with trust? The Gottman Institute emphasizes that knowing your emotional triggers and needs helps build stronger connections later.
2. Strengthen Emotional Regulation
Managing emotions is essential in navigating relationship stress. Practicing mindfulness, seeking therapy, or developing healthy coping tools can increase your ability to stay grounded during tough conversations or disagreements.
3. Clarify Your Relationship Values
Long-term success often depends on alignment in values. Take time to define what matters most to you: emotional safety, shared life goals, or communication styles. SYMBIS (Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts) research highlights that couples with clear, shared expectations experience greater satisfaction.
4. Practice Effective Communication
Even outside romantic partnerships, practicing assertive yet respectful communication enhances relationship readiness. This includes setting boundaries, expressing needs, and active listening.
5. Cultivate a Supportive Life
Build friendships, hobbies, and self-care routines that nurture your well-being. A fulfilling life outside of partnership reduces the pressure on relationships and fosters interdependence, not co-dependence.
Being single isn’t a waiting room—it’s preparation. With intentional self-growth, you can enter future relationships equipped for the challenges—and joys—of lasting love.
References:
- Gottman Institute (www.gottman.com)
- SYMBIS Assessment (www.symbis.com)