Strategies for Communicating with Your Teenage Daughter

There comes a time when every mother-daughter relationship has stress – which usually comes around the teenage years. Mothers are always trying to protect their daughters which can lead to confrontation around this age period. As mothers, you naturally want to guide your daughter during this time and give some insight. During this time, communication can be limited and strained. The relationship tends to adapt to balancing independence and expectations. Communication and the relationship can grow and improve during this time if used appropriately. Your daughter wants to be seen, heard, supported, and communicated to in a nonjudgmental way.

One thing I always communicate to my clients is that we can only control ourselves. That being said, we need to drop our expectations of our daughter and accept and allow growth during their journey of finding themselves. Something else we can all work on when it comes to communicating is respectful listening. Your daughter wants to be heard, not talked at or lectured. You can still communicate what you want your daughter to hear, but listen to hear your daughter, not to respond. This will help grow your relationship and allow open communication as your daughter feels you support them and are not there to make them feel guilty about their decisions.

Something that can also help promote better communication is by staying calm. During this age, your child is most likely going to be experiencing some things for the first time. Instead of reacting, tell your daughter you are happy they shared this with you. You can be supportive in this way while also discussing safety. Sharing your own stories with you daughter may also promote an environment where they don’t feel so alone and can relate to you. Try to create a special time for the two of you to bond. Just Between Us has a mother and daughter journal with different prompts that may allow the two of you to connect as well.

If you and your daughter are needing help with your relationship during these years of transition, feel free to reach out to Summit Counseling to schedule a session!

“No matter how much I say I love you, I always love you more than that”